Nothing to Seek, Nothing to Rush
Nada que buscar, nada que apurar
A student describes a quiet shift: the search for something in the future has fallen away, replaced by a soft trust in the present moment. The teacher explores how the journey evolves from seeking a distant goal to savoring direct experience, and why there is no pressure to hurry.
Nothing to Seek, Nothing to Rush
A student describes a quiet shift: the search for something in the future has fallen away, replaced by a soft trust in the present moment. The teacher explores how the journey evolves from seeking a distant goal to savoring direct experience, and why there is no pressure to hurry.
There was something you described during the meditation about savoring these moments of knowing, without having to push for anything. It was so beautiful. What I noticed is that, for the longest time, I was seeking. Lately, I feel there is nothing to seek for. And yet, from the other side, even though there is no seeking for something, even though there is no end goal I'm supposed to approach or get toward, there is something I can stop doing. It feels like being very mindful about the indulgence on something. So the equation has reversed in terms of what I actually do. I would love to hear your thoughts on that.
If I have a sense of what you're describing: at first, when we get into this work, we turn it into something we know. It becomes a positive thing, but we don't really understand what we're getting into. We feel that there is value. We feel that there is something we want, and we might feel it in someone who is communicating this, or in something that simply resonates. We go toward that. And that is a very valuable part of the process, but we are making it into something that is somewhat related to what we already know. We interpret what it is, we form ideas about what it is, and so the work itself becomes a transitional object.
The transitional object
We can form a whole belief and an identity around the teaching, and we can get attached to that. It is not a bad thing. It is the first part of the process. But as we go deeper, that attachment is going to be in the way, and at some point we need to drop it and keep going without it.
That usually happens when the present moment, in its mystery, becomes the reality we were looking for, and we are able to savor it directly. That is what I was talking about in the meditation: when the carrot is the present moment itself, and we start to acquire the taste. We go from, "This is something I have to do; it is effortful, uncomfortable, unpleasant, but I do it because I am following that thing over there in the future," to something more direct. And the earlier stage is necessary, because at first we genuinely do not see the value of the present moment.
Different paths, one destination
I was also talking about how different paths are ways in which we can discover that value. On the path of truth, if it resonates with me, that is the work that will help me recognize the value of the present moment, because directly, I do not see it. I do not experience it. I want to run away from it. The same holds for the path of love and devotion. Through that, it resonates with me to open myself to something, perhaps a person, and that is going to bring me to the present moment, outside of myself. These are all different paths that resonate with an individual in order to trust the present moment more than their mind, more than their beliefs.
From trust in the teaching to trust in direct experience
When that trust starts to become direct, you no longer trust only the transitional object, the teaching or the teacher. You start to trust your direct experience. You see the value in the present moment. You regularly find truth, love, and beauty there. And then there is a loss, because you are leaving behind the transitional aspect of what the teaching or the teacher was. It is not that you say, "I don't want that anymore." It simply stops being the thing you go through. You can still have all kinds of relationship with the teaching and the teacher, but you no longer need it in the same way. There is something you are finding directly. And so there is a loss of a narrative, a loss of a story, and that can bring some sadness.
I am not saying you no longer need it fully and purely. It is more that you now know the taste directly, and some of the relationship through which you used to taste it is going to start losing its effect and its power.
Yes, I think what makes sense is this experience that there is no future something to move toward. And the relationship that before was the teaching and the teacher, I do still feel that as a space, a very fast, direct way into the present moment for me. But there was something so softly reassuring about the recognition that there is really nothing to seek, and it is on your own time. This moment is as it is, perfect, with my desires, my inquisitiveness, with everything. It brought a very sweet smile. Thank you.
No rush
I feel very deeply that we create all the time we want to take. There is no need, no obligation, no pressure. We can take as much time as we want on this journey, because in a sense we are here to have the journey, to explore it. There is time.
I think the pressure we feel, the "should" and "shouldn't," the goal-seeking and achieving, is transferred from a mindset that is appropriate in some aspects of life. But when that becomes the way we live with everything, it is something to grow out of, something to transcend. We need to be able to develop strength by facing challenges, and for that we often need the ability to work, face discomfort, and commit. But with this work, at some point we can really start to explore our freedom and enjoy. We can discover with childlike innocence. If going for a walk every day rather than sitting and meditating is what makes your heart sing, if looking at the birds, or writing, or whatever it may be brings you close to a sense of joy and love, then that is perfect.
The speed of the shift
It can be very surprising to notice how contracted and suffering we can be, and then, if there is a shift out of that, we can really taste well-being, even for a moment, and feel expanded and joyful. That contrast, and the speed at which it can happen, can really show you that no time is needed. The idea that there is some huge requirement of decades of practice and enormous effort is one-sided. Something deeper is at play, which operates at the soul level.
To put it bluntly, though very imprecisely: what the universe, or God, has chosen to live as us right now might be a life in duality. The function of identification is God's creation. We chose that. We chose to separate. We chose to have this experience of being a human being. I know that can come across as a belief, and in words it is coming only as an offering, a possibility to consider. There is no rush. It is going to take the time that it takes.