Silence and the Presence of Suffering
El silencio y la presencia del sufrimiento
A student describes finding unexpected silence during meditation, even while knowing that suffering has been present in recent days, and the teacher clarifies the distinction between invoking stories of suffering and looking for contraction in present experience.
Silence and the Presence of Suffering
A student describes finding unexpected silence during meditation, even while knowing that suffering has been present in recent days, and the teacher clarifies the distinction between invoking stories of suffering and looking for contraction in present experience.
I actually experienced something similar in the meditation, and it was very helpful to hear your earlier answer, which resonated with me. I know there is suffering in me, but as of right now there is all this silence. I can evoke what creates suffering for me, but do I really want to right now? Maybe I'll just give myself another day. At some point during the meditation I had a similar thought: right now there's a lot of silence, and there are other things that could evoke suffering, but I don't want to bring them up.
But the invitation is different from what you're describing. At least what I meant to invite is not to invoke thoughts that create suffering. I was inviting you to look, right now, in your present experience, for any sense of contraction, any feeling that what's happening shouldn't be happening, any sense that something's not okay. That is different from invoking a story.
Invoking a story vs. noticing contraction
That's a good clarification, because I felt more like I could do the latter. I can start thinking about things I know would bring me to suffering, but the current experience is very strangely silent right now. When I scan my body for where the pain is, where the fear is, there's actually quite a release happening, a kind of silent release. So I was more inclined to say, "Well, I know that if I invite myself to contemplate this or that story, it could bring suffering." And that's exactly what I felt I didn't want to do.
Yes, exactly.
I think the words just take us where they take us, and it's hard to distinguish. The distinction isn't always clear. But I found really valuable the way you were answering the earlier question, especially because I've been suffering a lot in the past few days. And so today, particularly, I noticed: there's just all this silence, and yet I know there's suffering in my experience.
Yes.
Okay. Thank you.
I wasn't inviting that. If I somehow suggested it, that's not what I meant. But it's also not a bad thing to explore. I'm not saying it's wrong. It's just not what I was inviting today.