The Lovingness That Is Already Inside
El Amor Que Ya Está Dentro
A teacher shares a meditation experience of deep, accepting love connected to the memory of a beloved teacher, and is guided to question whether that love is truly located outside, in certain people, places, or moments.
The Lovingness That Is Already Inside
A teacher shares a meditation experience of deep, accepting love connected to the memory of a beloved teacher, and is guided to question whether that love is truly located outside, in certain people, places, or moments.
I wanted to share something. I was leading a group here in Buenos Aires, and I did a meditation. Lately, almost every time I do the circular breathing, I seem to connect with this in slightly different ways. It seems to be everywhere.
This time it started with prayer. Many times when I pray openly, asking for help, things happen. Recently I started praying to a teacher who passed away. For me, he is such a strong symbol of that place of love. And there was this recognition of a love that is so accepting, so gentle, so present all the time. No matter what we are going through, no matter how many tensions and resistances we carry in our bodies, it is totally accepting.
There was also a great compassion in it. People who have passed, my grandmother, my teacher: if they are there, they are fine. We are the ones who deserve all the compassion, all the courage it takes to go through this suffering. If you are there, it is totally home. It is beautiful. Nobody truly deserves judgment. Going through this life is the hard thing.
What you are saying is beautiful. That is a beautiful meditation. It sounds like you are describing a realization of this lovingness that you are touching, which the image of your teacher represents.
The lovingness begins far away
That lovingness, when we begin this work, feels far away. It comes perhaps only in the presence of somebody like a grandparent or a teacher, especially a teacher. But ultimately, the process is to recognize that what you are finding and experiencing there is inside of you.
You have, in different ways, encountered that in the circular breathings especially. And now you can start to look into how we tend to place that lovingness in a person, an object, a situation, or a context, for example a meditation. There is a sense that it is somehow out there, in a place or in time.
Questioning the subtle belief
This is a really subtle exploration. In a sense, it is all about questioning beliefs, and they are very subtle beliefs. For example: "I can only experience this loving compassion when I am in the presence of this person." That belief is valuable, because it can bring you into the presence of that person. But at some point you can go deeper and question: is this only available at a certain time and in a certain place?
I am not proposing that you believe it is always present. I am proposing that you question the belief. Just wonder: what if it is not only available at a certain time and in a certain place? I feel like you are coming close to that edge where something could really shift.
I don't know if this is the same thing, but my sense is that it is there all the time. I just recognize it more in certain meditations, in certain moments.
Maybe. But if you at times experience the lack of it, then you do not yet fully experience that it is always there.