A student describes the intensity of recognizing they weren't the one "doing" during a powerful experience, prompting the teacher to explore two radical approaches to liberation: taking total responsibility for everything, and surrendering all responsibility to God.
A student describes the intensity of recognizing they weren't the one "doing" during a powerful experience, prompting the teacher to explore two radical approaches to liberation: taking total responsibility for everything, and surrendering all responsibility to God.
I recognized that yesterday when it snowballed. During the experience, all sorts of stuff was coming up, like "I'm responsible for this." Hindsight is always useful, isn't it? But then I recognized that it couldn't have happened any other way. I didn't do anything. It wasn't me doing it; it just happened. But it's tricky in the moment because it's quite intense.
I'll say something about that specifically. Something I realized and wrote down in a conversation several years ago was that one way to fully wake up, to live toward liberation, is absolute total responsibility for everything: one takes absolute responsibility for everything.
Now, something I speak to often is: "The Tao that is spoken is not the true Tao." Any expression is one side of a coin. Taking absolute responsibility for everything is one side, and I had never contemplated what the other side might be.
The two paths
But this morning, someone shared something they'd heard: that there are two paths. One has to do with abiding in the sense of being. The other is to give all responsibility to God.
And that struck me as perfect, exactly the other side. Because if one gives all responsibility to God, one recognizes what I had seen with different language: I have no will of my own, and nothing that I do comes from me. It is all God.
But I came to that through taking responsibility for everything. Every single movement. Everything that I had a problem with was my problem.
Taken to the absolute extreme
Both paths need to be taken to the absolute extreme. You can't go halfway. For me, it has to be absolutely total. Giving total, absolute responsibility to God brings you to the realization that you are nothing. There is nothing that you are. It is all God. But it comes through "I am nothing."
Whereas taking responsibility for everything brings you to "I am the creator." I am responsible for the rain. I am responsible for all of the pain that I have been in, that everybody has been in. But I can't see that and remain a person. That's where it has to be taken to the extreme. Otherwise, delusions can appear.
And that's something that's come up recently as well: what is my true intention with all this? That question helped refine it.
Yes. Because if responsibility is given to God, but one still believes one is choosing and then acts from delusion, that is a cop-out. If all responsibility is given to God, then there needs to be a really profound surrender.
Oh yeah, absolutely. So both paths are really just allowing life to move you, not resisting any of it.
The risk of mind traps
Yes, but it's a very risky endeavor, full of mind traps. I prefer the responsibility path because it brings you out of the mechanism of identification. At the root of identification is a sense of victimhood: "This is happening to me. I don't want it to be this way. It shouldn't be this way. Something is being done to me." I am the passive victim of what's happening, in some way. And at the core of that is a belief in a separate self.
We humans love that. Me, me, me, boo-hoo-hoo. Do we love it? It's a love-hate. But that's part of it. If it were pure love, there would be no boo-hoo-hoo. It would be like a true masochist, blissed out in his pain.
"Nothing to do" is itself a trap
So there's nothing to do.
"Nothing to do" is a tricky thought. That's a thought, right? If that creates a paradigm, watch out.
Right. I don't mean it literally.
Then there's humor that does nothing. A lot of mind traps. Funny, isn't it?