Sitting with Pain and Finding Support
Sentarse con el dolor y encontrar apoyo
A student describes the difficulty of staying with intense fear and physical pain without ruminating, and the teacher encourages seeking guided, relational support to work through it.
Sitting with Pain and Finding Support
A student describes the difficulty of staying with intense fear and physical pain without ruminating, and the teacher encourages seeking guided, relational support to work through it.
Sometimes I stay too long in that space and then I have to pull away because I don't know what to do with it.
And by "it," you mean fear.
The fear, the pain. It just feels like ruminating.
How does it feel? Because if you're ruminating, that's a particular thing. Describe how it feels, if you remember.
My heart is racing. It's hard to breathe. I feel sick to my stomach.
The body already knows
So you're saying you're ruminating, which means there's a lot of thinking about it. But if you're feeling your heart racing and feeling sick, that's a very embodied experience.
It's really hard to sit with that for too long. I don't know how to change it. I mean, I'm not trying to change it, but I know that if I sit in it for too long, it feels pointless.
I would really recommend, if you could, sitting with that alongside someone regularly, someone who can help you work through it. You need guidance in the moment, in person (it can be through video as well), but that's what a professional can offer. There is a way through this.
I don't get to that point with someone. I only reach that space on my own.
The possibility of trust
I understand. But you can work toward that. It will have to do with trust, and even if what arises is a memory, it's still, as you describe it, very much alive. If we were to go more and more into it, it would start to touch the living thing, because it's present. There really is a way, and you can have support for it. It would be about going into the sensations, sitting with them, bringing a kind of hospitality to the fear and the pain, looking at the thoughts that are coming up, sharing them, working through them. Clarifying. Healing deeply. Feeling more deeply.
I guess I've been really fearing that too.
Yes. Of course.
It's scary.
I really wish that for you. I feel that you're ready for it.
I know. It's just a matter of taking action.
Gentleness, not force
Be gentle. Don't push. This is not something we do through forcing. It's a gentle movement.
It's definitely been in the back of my mind, and in the forefront at times. I know you've been really encouraging that. Thank you.
You're welcome. Take care.