Seeking Until You Find
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A reflection on why seeking is not the problem itself, but rather where and how we seek, and on the discovery that what we are looking for is always already here.
Seeking Until You Find
A reflection on why seeking is not the problem itself, but rather where and how we seek, and on the discovery that what we are looking for is always already here.
Many teachers today speak about seeking being the problem, and I agree in a sense, because the end comes when seeking stops. But I would say seeking stops when we find.
Seek and don't stop seeking until you find
This is why I love the first saying in the Gospel of Thomas: "Seek, and don't stop seeking until you find." I think it's really important. The problem is: what are we looking for? If we are expecting to find something in the future, something that we imagine, then we're looking in the wrong place. Keep seeking, but seek now, seek in the now. You are looking for something that is valuable and true and real, but it's not in time. It's always here, now.
Why is it not known?
So why is it not known? Because it's veiled. And how is it veiled? By our misunderstanding of what we are experiencing: the nature of this experience, the nature of this reality. It's a misunderstanding, a misinterpretation, because we haven't looked closely enough. We haven't tasted it directly enough.
We can explore the nature of what is being experienced: the reality of sensation, perception, thought. We can explore what might be called the object of experience. But we can also look more directly at the subject of experience, the apparent subject. All of that is here now. It's always here now. It's always present.
Looking in time means looking in thought
Instead of looking for something in time, recognize that when we look in time, we're always going to be looking in thought, because time only exists as an imagination. The future only ever exists in imagination. It never comes to be. That's the wrong place to look. That's the seeking that is, let's say, uninformed.
This is it
There is a phrase I love, and in a sense it's related to this. It is simply: "This is it." In a sense, that is a complete teaching. What are you looking for? What is "this"? What does "this is it" mean? It's always true. It always applies. So I could add it to the teaching: seek, and don't stop seeking until you find. Until you find what? This is it. You will find when you realize that this is it, when you see for yourself, "Oh yes, this is it." Then seeking stops, because this is here. It's always here. I don't need to do anything. It always is.